I Want What I Want...

Think about something you want...whatever it is....money, a new car, a new relationship, to lose weight...whatever it is...why is it that you want it?  I know there may be different reasons, but the truth is, at the core of everything that we want...and I mean everything...is the desire to feel better than we do right now.  Do you see what I'm talking about?  If you want more money, it's because you need to pay bills, or you want to travel or quit your job...but the truth is, we only want to pay bills so we can relax and not have to worry about creditors (not worrying feels better than worry, relaxing feels better than stress) and we only want to quit our job so we would have more time to do things that are more fun than work, like travel.  So think about something you want...how would it feel to have it?  Imagine your bills are all paid off and you have all the money you need to do whatever you want...what does that feel like in your imagination?  Now, be careful not to get too specific because that can make you feel worse, but if you can make yourself feel just a little bit better, your rewards will be great.  I know how naive that sounds, but I know this to be true.  Look at it this way...your financial situation is what it is...your love life, health, body weight...are what they are.  You can pine over the things you don't have (feels bad) or you can feel good while still wanting the things you don't have.  Either way, you don't have everything you want, but why do you have to feel bad about it?

I learned this lesson ten years ago when my son was first diagnosed with cancer.  This was devastating news to me!  I had no idea how I would continue to live a normal life.  I quickly realized that my son responded to my moods, so when I was with him in the hospital, I forced myself to be upbeat and happy.  It didn't take long for me to realize I was more able to cope when I was upbeat and happy.  So my lesson was...it is what it is, in this case, my son has cancer.  It is what it is whether I am wallowing in sorrow or living upbeat and happy.  As a matter of fact, my son benefited from my being upbeat and happy.  At first, I think I felt like I was being disrespectful in some way if I was upbeat while my son was sick, but the truth is, my son, as well as the rest of our loved ones, benefited from my mood.

So here's the thing, you want more money...it is what it is.  I'm not saying to stop the actions you might take to make more money...but change the way you look at the lack.  After all, the only reason we want what we want is to feel better in the having of it...so why not just feel better now, even before we get it?  Give it a try...