Things I know: Rule #4: Do the Right Thing

Things I know: Rule #4: Do the Right Thing: I once heard a quote that said "Integrity is doing the right thing when no one is looking". That's so true, isn't it?  We ...

Rule #4: Do the Right Thing

I once heard a quote that said "Integrity is doing the right thing when no one is looking". That's so true, isn't it?  We always know what the right thing is, don't we?  There's a little voice...conscience... something telling us what's right and what's wrong.  In order to live a happy life, we have to be happy with the person we are, and that means being a person of integrity.  Being able to look ourselves in the mirror and like what we see...with the full understanding that what's right for us may not be what's right for someone else...but with the acceptance of both.  

Over this past year, this rule has expanded for me.  I have come to recognize a difference between conscience and intuition.  So this rule now has two parts.  The first part is doing the right thing as a moral decision as I've just discussed, in which case you would be listening to your conscience.  The second part, as I've come to see it is more of a personal "right" thing, in which case you would be listening to your intuition.  Over the past year, I have been focusing on hearing that little voice that I have been ignoring for so long...my intuition.  This has been revolutionary for me!  As with your conscience, the more you focus on hearing your intuition, the stronger it becomes.  Developing your intuition is fun!  This holiday season alone I have avoided traffic jams, found just the right store to get just the right gift, found money on the ground, ran into the right person who gave me the perfect idea, arrived just before crowds and more great parking spaces to list here.

There is no secret weapon to developing either your conscience or intuition, except practice.  Think of them like muscles...the more you use them, the stronger they become.  There is no down side to this...follow your inner voices and always do the right thing!  You'll thank me later...

Things I know: Rule #3: Don't Hold a Grudge

Things I know: Rule #3: Don't Hold a Grudge: I suppose this rule can also be called Forgive...because that's what holding a grudge is all about, isn't it?  Until we forgive, we ...

Rule #3: Don't Hold a Grudge

I suppose this rule can also be called Forgive...because that's what holding a grudge is all about, isn't it?  Until we forgive, we can't move on.  We become stuck in the same place forever.  As with all these rules, forgiveness...not holding a grudge...is really a selfish act.  It's about allowing ourself the freedom to move forward.  Holding on to the infraction does much more harm to ourself than to the other person.  So why is it so hard?  I think it's because forgiveness is often mistaken for condoning. Forgiveness doesn't mean the infraction is okay, it means the infraction is over.  Learning to forgive is one of the best gifts you can give to yourself.  It's liberating, freeing, empowering. 

Often, the grudge takes on a life of its own.  Have you ever had the experience, or known someone who lost years to a grudge over a minor infraction?  Lives can be changed by forgiveness!  Especially yours!  The earlier you forgive, the easier it is, but it's never too late.  It's not even important for the other party to accept your forgiveness...it's only important for you to let go.  Imagine how much happier your life will be when you forgive and let go of the grudges that hold you back!  Forgive early and often...you owe it to yourself.  Live happy!

Things I know: Rule #2: Always Be Kind

Things I know: Rule #2: Always Be Kind: It seems silly to even make this a rule...of course we should always be kind...but remember, I wrote these rules for myself...to guide mysel...

Rule #2: Always Be Kind

It seems silly to even make this a rule...of course we should always be kind...but remember, I wrote these rules for myself...to guide myself on how I should live my life.  Being kind is of the utmost importance to me.  Being kind means making a difference in the lives of others, it means being a caring  person, it means feeling good about myself.  Kindness makes every situation just a little bit better.

Think of a time when you had a kindness bestowed on you...the other day, I was at the supermarket and a man was dressed like Santa walking around the store handing out $10 gift certificates to the store.  I figured it was a promotion of some sort, until he made his way to me.  He explained that he was commitimg random acts of kindness in the name of a fallen fellow police officer and would I be so kind as to "pay it forward". This touched my heart...what better way to honor a friend?  In every interaction we have with others, every single day, we have the opportunity to be kind or unkind.  Imagine if every time we interacted with others, that person would "pay it forward"...if we snap at someone, that person snaps at another...if we smile at someone, that person smiles at another...if we treat someone with kindness, that person is kind to another...get the picture?  It's like a drop of water in a still pond...the ripples are endless.  What ripples do you want to create?

I choose to live life kindly...I've been told that people will walk all over me because I'm too nice, I've been told that I won't get far in life by being Mr. Nice Guy... Well I contend the exact opposite, and I encourage you to see for yourself.  In fact, I believe it is kindness behind much of my success, certainly my success with my interactions with people.  I have found that people WANT to help me...they WANT me to succeed and all because I am kind to them.  Which leads me to my last point, being kind is ultimately a selfish act...it feels really good, people are kind back, people will help you and your world becomes a brighter place...frankly, it's addicting...and a habit I gladly succumb to!

Things I know: Rule #1: I Am Responsible

Things I know: Rule #1: I Am Responsible: For those of you new to this blog, some 30 years ago, I wrote down 25 rules that I live my life by.  Last year, I started writing down my th...