Justification

I think the root of all evil is justification...okay, maybe I'm exaggerating, but think about it. Behind every bad thought, every bad behavior is a justification.  When we are mad at someone, our mind is full of all the reasons why we have every right to be angry.  The more we justify, the angrier we get.  If we eat something we shouldn't, we find a justification for why it's okay.  If we say something we shouldn't, we have a justification for that, too.  We use justification as an excuse...but who are we really hurting?  If I am mad at someone and my mind is full of justification, is the object of my anger hurt or is it me?

I don't think we can eliminate negative justification from our world, or even our thoughts, but I think we can reduce it with awareness.  Justification has a tendency of taking on a life of its own.  If we can stop the momentum before it gets too big, we can live a happier life.

So lets pretend your spouse left dishes in the sink...when you first see them, there is an annoyance. Then you remember that this is not the first time, and your annoyance becomes anger.  You've told your spouse hundreds of times to put the dishes in the dishwasher!  Dirty dishes attract bugs and smell bad!  It is a health issue, the whole family can get sick!  And who is he leaving these dishes for anyway!?  I ALWAYS have to clean up his dirty dishes! ...By the time your poor spouse enters the room, he doesn't stand a chance!  In addition, you feel terrible.  You're angry, feeling used.  But lets say you've read this blog and recognized your justification at annoyance.  If you stopped there, when your spouse walked into the room, you might say "can you put your dishes in the dishwasher?" and it would be over.  Trust me, your spouse has a justification for leaving the dishes in the sink in the first place...why get into a war of justifications?

I wonder why we don't use justification to our benefit?   What if we paid attention to our thoughts and used justification to increase the momentum of positive thoughts and actions?  At the very least, just being aware will reduce the negative justification...